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A Year Ago Today … Day 4

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A year ago today … the day that all the shock, sadness, anger, pain and information overload the past week came to a head and I completely broke down.

I had to stay strong … I was the one that knew every detail of Layla’s life and had to be “on” to deal with all the information from the doctors.

Friday after work was my time … it was my chance to let out all those emotions. I got home from work, walked over to my beautiful baby girl, snuggled up next to her, squeezed her tight and just sobbed. Okay, it wasn’t really sobbing. It was more like a wailing, screaming cry with intermittent convulsing and gasping for air. I remember crying so hard my eyelashes got squeezed up under my eyelids.

As Layla got older, she was not to keen on snuggling and if you would curl up next to her she would get up and walk away. She was a strong, independent tough little cookie. This night though … she just laid there and let me sob all over. That was the best gift I could have ever received. She needed me to help her through this and I needed her to help me.

Thank you princess Layla for always being there for me … you always knew when I need you the most. Like now …

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